I have a girlfriend with whom I don’t always see eye to eye. Sometimes I wonder why we’re even friends, because we don’t agree on much. She’s conservative. I’m liberal. She’s super-religious. I’m … not. She hates the entertainment world and I write about it for a living. She’s “Anne Klein” and I’m bourgeoisie thrift. And yet, despite our cultural differences, something draws us toward one another.
Ten years ago, our friendship wouldn’t have worked out. I would have been too controlling, too impatient and too immature to realize that differences can be beautiful. I’m eating a big piece of humble pie in admitting this, but I now realize that I wasn’t always looking for friends in the past. I didn’t always seek out people who would not only encourage me, but expect and challenge me to become better. I was looking for toy soldiers. Fans, Shellie Groupies, people who would co-sign for me and cheer me through any and everything I did — even if it was dead wrong.
What I’m starting to realize now about my friend is that our relationship is a balancing act, even though we’re extreme opposites. She gets me to read the newspaper; I get her to go to movies. She gets me to invest in something other than graphic t-shirts; I get her to actually wear tennis shoes. She gets me to think and listen; I get her to think and listen. We may not agree all of the time. In fact we rarely do. But even in agreeing to disagree, we grow. And growth, even when it hurts and wears you out, never is a bad thing.